week 22 RJ
Week 22 ‘… but where did it go?’ she shouted…
The Mysterious Sailboat!
One sunny day on the beach I saw a mysterious sail boat floating in the sea. I checked it out. It was completely empty! I jumped on the boat and thought I would sail the seas a bit. Suddenly, the boat disappeared!!! “But where did it go?” I shouted. I was sinking to the bottom of the ocean!!!!!!! Magically, I started floating and swimming! “How could this be possible?!” Suddenly a big rock was floating in the sky! The rock started falling towards me!!!!! I quickly swam to shore and the rock landed in the water! What a crazy adventure!
I really like how you manage to share with the reader your characters sense of confusions by the use of the very short sentences. I would suggest looking for other ways to express emphasis though rather than multiple exclamation points.
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