Kylie Week 28

 My dog is a doberman and he will be very mean and will kill. whenever he kills he lets out a pitiful houl once as he let out a pitiful houl the police came because he killed a bunny. So we got him a muzzle. We had to put his name on the muzzle  so we put blaze since that is his name.blaze has attempted to attack me and eat everything like magnets doors window screens curtain pole floor walls glass blankets paper metal light bulb mirror candles lighters and more. We walked him and he went crazy. bye

Comments

  1. Morgan (Team 100)April 25, 2021 at 8:25 AM

    Wow, sounds like a mean dog! You are trying hard with your capital letters, so just a reminder that names (like Blaze) and the beginning of sentences should have capital letters. If you have a big list what would make it easier to read would be commas (like these , , ,). I think you have tried very hard with this story, so thank you very much, and have a lovely week!

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  2. Mrswills1April 26, 2021 at 4:12 AM

    Greetings from Australia Kylie. I wonder if you have a Doberman, as you include specific information about that breed. Most people have, or have had, a dog as a pet, so as soon you write about a dog, you engage most readers. Sometimes when you are focusing on getting your ideas down, punctuation can be forgotten. I suggest that you ask a friend to help you edit for punctuation before you publish. Accurate punctuation makes a text really easy for your readers to read, and understand. 🙏😊

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